Come Outta There, You Big Heifer!

This morning I was sitting at my desk.

Because that's what I do at work.

Suddenly, an officer from the Lamar Police Department walked in, ordered me to stand up, and started yelling at my belly, "Come outta there, you big heifer!  Yo mama tired a carryin' you 'round!"

Great.

Thanks a million, officer.  I'm sure your motivational speech will inspire her to come immediately. 

I couldn't do this without you.

And thank you for referring to my baby as a "big heifer". 

There's really nothing like being compared to a cow before you're even born.