Tuesday, July 22, 2014

8 Months


*  He is working on his eighth tooth.  STILL.  I'm over it.

*  He is pulling up on everything.  EVERYTHING.  I'm going to have to start wearing protective gear on my sensitive bits.  Pulling up means falling a lot.  And crying a lot.  A LOT.  Because he can't be where he wants to be right when he wants to be there and then when he does get there, his sister takes away whatever he was after in the first place.

*  He still can't crawl to save his life.  Not that he wants to.  Who wants to crawl when you can stand?

*  He is still up in the night.  I've been trying to let him cry-it-out.  It's caused more problems than it's fixed.  Because his crying wakes up his sister, who in turn comes into our room screaming.  Then Husband lets her in the bed.  Then I can't sleep.  Then I make her go get her blanket and sleep on the floor.  And then she wakes up with Husband in the morning and then won't take a nap in the afternoon and is generally disagreeable.

*  He loves his sister and thinks she's hilarious.

* He is still refusing solid foods.  And I'm still trying to trick him into eating them.  It's torture for both of us.

*He's still nursing about six times daily and shows no sign of slowing.  I'm going to be nursing him until he's ten.

4 Years Old


Carolyn turned 4 yesterday.  And of means that she doesn't want to get her picture taken at all and when she does, she gives that fake 4-year-old smile. 

She's super fired up about being four since that means she can now go to school.  She's been asking to go to school for two years.  She's also excited to be the same age as all of the rest of her friends.  There's only one other girl in her class at church who's younger than her and she could barely stand to be three while all the rest of them got to hold up four fingers.

She was assigned to give the prayer in sharing time at Primary last Sunday.  I've never seen anyone more excited to pray in my life.  The primary presidency wanted to know if she needed help and my response was, "We'll see, but I doubt it."

She continues to be fearless and confident in pretty much everything she does.  This, for the most part, makes her think she's in charge pretty much all the time and she loathes having to follow instructions. 

She's learning more and more words and makes me laugh pretty much every day. 

She still refuses to wear clothing beyond her undies if we are at home and has become a little more vocal about what she will wear when we leave the house.  But, anything that "makes her look like Elsa" is generally tolerated.

She has just recently learned right from left and due to that, is finally putting her shoes on the right feet 70% of the time.

She is tolerating her brother and naturally, thinks she should be in charge of him and everything he does or touches.  About 900 times everyday, I hear, "TATE!  No, no!"

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Cow Appreciation Day

Yesterday was Cow Appreciation Day at Chick-Fil-A.

This is where you dress like a cow and show up and they give each person a FREE MEAL.  Or, if you're us, you show up twice a day and get TWO FREE MEALS (because that's like $40 in free food and that's a lot of money).

Carolyn gets almost as excited about it as she does about Christmas.

She was up at 1am, 3am, and 6am because she was just sure she was going to miss it.

She kept saying, "It's a very special day!  We can't be late!"

I meant to be all ready and stuff with super cute costumes.

And then I forgot all about it until the night before and was scrambling around trying to find a white shirt I could slap some black paint on and some felt and elastic to make new ears (because the ears from last year have been floating around all the way until today when naturally, we couldn't find them).

Anyway, we spent hours at Chick-Fil-A (and I do mean HOURS) and in the end, Carolyn came in third in her division in the costume contest (Tate fell asleep right before the judging) and won 10 free meals at it.  Needless to say, she was not impressed.

Here's the picture overload:

Heaven help me, but I need a haircut^^^

And Tater ended up having to take two naps in his carrier and he was not happy about it.

By the end of the day, all of us were so tired, Carolyn had to take a rest in the boiling hot parking lot before modeling in the costume contest.

Sunday, July 06, 2014

I Never Thought I'd Sell Something...

I never thought I'd be one of those people who sells stuff. 

Because let's be honest, people who sell stuff are pretty annoying.

Most of the time. 

But, I tried the Jamberry nails and loved them.

They really do last the two weeks they promise if you apply them correctly (and if I can do it, anyone can)!

And then, since I loved them so much, I wanted to get a discount on them.

So, now I'm an official consultant.

That's a fancy word for "awesome".

But, look at how cool your nails can look!

I don't know why my hand looks yellow in the picture above...maybe I was messing with lemons.

Anyway, if anyone is interested in trying some or in hosting a party (I got NINE free and half price sheets of nail wraps during my online party...that's like $350 worth of stuff for FREE), let me know.  Because I'm fired up.  And beside that, my nails look fabulous.  They have 350 nail designs to choose from...and that's like 300 more than you'll ever look at.

Here's the link!

A Million of the Same Thing

Carolyn will no longer sit still for pictures.

Tate has just now learned to army crawl (like four days ago), so now he won't hold still either.

Here's the last bunch of pictures...where Tate just had to sit there, so they all look the same.


The Swimming Pool

That one girl who gets dizzy and almost passes out every time she blows up a single balloon?

That same girl bought a giant blow up pool for the back patio.

Like an idiot.

At least the kids like it.

Even if they're swimming in it while their mother is passed out in the corner.

Saturday, July 05, 2014

Swimming Lessons

Carolyn took two weeks of swimming lessons in June.

At the beginning, I thought it might be a waste of money since the only thing she was interested in was telling everyone what to do.

But, she actually progressed - at the end, she could dive (kind of), tread water to the count of 100, hold her breath under water for twenty seconds (that's not really that impressive), and miracle of miracles, swim without her floatie! 

I'm not going to lie, I was pretty darn proud.

Saturday, June 21, 2014

7 Months

The Tater made seven months!

We all know what that means!  Parent of the year RIGHT HERE!

At seven months, The Tater:
* has just gotten his seventh tooth.  He's basically been teething for 2.5 months straight.  It's been awesome.
*has been getting up on his elbows and knees for several weeks.  Graduated to hands and knees just today.  Started army crawling in inches (maybe like centimeters).  If he'd stop whining about not being able to crawl, he'd be able to crawl.  You know?
*continues to hate solid food.  Like all solid food.  But especially green beans.  I can trick him into eating it, but he's not enthusiastic at all.  He looks at you after every bite that's been forced on him like, "why are you doing this to me?!"

*loves his ninny.  He still eats every 2.5-3 hours.  Just like he did when he was a newborn.  And his mother has just about had enough.  She thought by adding at least one solid a day, we'd be able to cut out at least one feeding.  She could not have been more wrong.
*is in love with his monkey teething toy.  The only problem is that his sister also thinks it is her monkey teething toy and he frequently has to fight her for it.
*still does not sleep through the night.  He's up once or twice.  I've tried the cry-it-out thing and I end up being up for hours in the middle of the night just listening to him cry.  If I get up and feed him, it's usually 20 minutes or less.  And, since I value my sleep, that's what I do.  I'm not so awesome at this.
*has finally been freed completely from his swaddle.  He had grown too long for them anyway, but like always, I forced it about a month past when I should have.
*is a smiley little bugger.  When he's been fed and had a good nap.  And as long as I'm not pointing a camera at him.
*has recently been eschewing naps.  Like he doesn't want to take one at all.  Instead, he wants to lay on the floor and whine.  And whine.  And whine.  This really cramps my style.  The only way he'll nap longer than 20 minutes is if I'm right there beside him.  And he wakes up as soon as I move.  He's just like his daddy was as a baby.
*doesn't like to be held or snuggled.  I kept thinking that after Carolyn, my next one would be a snuggler.  Not so much.
*really likes his sister's attention.
*has eyes that are progessing further toward green everyday.  Husband thought he'd be blue eyed.  I told him a week after he was born that he wouldn't be.  He never believes me.

Sunday, June 15, 2014

More on Beauty

As you know, I'm on a quest.

To make myself beautiful.

Because having no natural beauty of my own, I really gotta try to help myself (ten billion bonus points to anyone who can name the root of that quote).


Hair.  Check. Sometimes check, I mean.

Eyelashes.  Check.

Sunburn cure.  Check.

On to one of two remaining things.


If I do have one claim to beauty, it is my fingernails.  They grow fast.  And they're super strong (which isn't really a bonus when you have to cut them).  They're not necessarily the prettiest or the best shaped.  And let's be honest, I have no idea how to file them on my own.

And believe me, I've tried everything.

I have bottles and bottle of nail polish.

Within the past year, I've tried pretty much every "at home shellac" pin on Pinterest.

When I worked at the spa and got 50% off, I used to get my nails shellaced all the time.  But, when I had to start paying full price, that ended real quick.

This one works, in case you want to know.

But it takes forever to to dry.  FOREVER.  And with little kids, that just doesn't work.

So, I was thrilled to find Jamberry.

Apparently, I'm the last person on earth to know about these.  Not that that's anything new.

They are nail wraps. 

That's fancy talk for stickers.  That stay on your nails for a long time.  And don't peel off.

They're supposed to last two weeks (and at $15 for a sheet, that's about $5/manicure.  Or, if you order three sheets, you get one free, so that's $12/sheet and $4/manicure).

They have a whole bunch of patterns and designs - like so many that I haven't made it to the end yet. 

Here's how you apply them.

I didn't buy the little heater dealie.  I just used my blow dryer and it worked just fine.  Oh, and also, I didn't actually apply them like I was supposed to (you really do need to push back those cuticles) and it turned out just fine.

Here's how it looked:

Day 1 (I also did Carolyn's nails):

Day 7:

Day 10:

Day 16:

I think I totally could have left them on for a few more days and they'd have still looked fine, but I wanted to try another nail wrap...because I'm kind of excited about these.

The very best part of all of this is that taking them off was soooooo easy.  A two minute soak in nail polish remover and peel them off and BAM!  Done.  And, no damage to your natural nails (shellac isn't supposed to damage nails either, but it made mine really weak and thin and crappy)!

I'm fired up about these.  If you want to order, I just happen to be hosting an online (Facebook) party for one of my friends who sells them (the link is above).

PS  This is not a paid advertisement (but wouldn't it be hilarious if a beauty company actually paid me to advertise for them?  It'd be like George Michael advertising testosterone).  I just really, really like these nail wraps!  And even more, I like sharing things I love with people around me.

Saturday, June 07, 2014

Haircut from Hell

Words a mother never wants to hear as your three-year-old (who you thought was asleep) comes strolling into your room holding your best sewing scissors, "Mama, I just cut my hair a little."

My reaction?


You better believe I cried when I'd assessed the damage.

And then she cried because I was crying and then she puked all over her bed because she was crying so hard.

And all I could think was, "She kind of looks like Ben Franklin."

And then I estimated her haircut at a 9 on the mullitude scale.

And then I rocked back and forth muttering to myself.

She'd managed to cut the entire crown of her head from front to back. 

In some places it's to the scalp.

The only reason she didn't cut more than that was because it was pulled back into a braid.

When I asked her why, she said, "Well, I didn't want it to get too long."

After much hand wringing and a call placed to the father of this child (she's not mine when she does stuff like this), I proceeded to put her in the tub, undo the braid, and wash her hair, pulling handful upon handful of cut hair off of her head.

And I cried.


It took three hours and a text and a call to Husband's hair dresser to decide the course of action we should take.

Shave it.  Just bloody shave it.

So I did.

She kind of looks like she has mange.

And she definitely looks like a boy.

She's very worried about the looking like a boy part.  Hopefully she's scared enough never to do it again.

This is what it looked like last night and then this morning:

I tried to put this flower on her and she said, "I don't want to wear this.  It will make me look ridiculous."
It's a bit late to think of looking ridiculous, now isn't it?

This morning we took her to Cracker Barrel looking like this:

Again, she refused all girly accessories (the crown included). 
I wonder what people thought.
Maybe she's sick.
Maybe her parents are some of those people who encourage their 3-year-old to be transgender.
Maybe she had a really bad case of lice.
Other than looking like a boy, though, she's already totally over it.  I, on the other hand, get a little bit of a shock every time I look at her.  All like, "OH. EM. GEE.  What happ...oh, yeah, you cut off all your hair."

Wednesday, June 04, 2014

The Sunburn Cure!

For the second times in as many weeks, I have a sunburn.

A bad sunburn.

I swear I sunscreened up.

I also swear that breastfeeding hormones make you more susceptible to sunburn.

First thing tomorrow, I'm after buying some new sunscreen.  Because that's the obvious answer, right?

In the meantime, I had to find a way to cure a sunburn immediately - because putting a writhing, scratching 6-month old right up against sunburned skin might be the worst torture known to man.

I've always been an aloe vera girl.  I even keep a tube of it in the fridge at all times.  It feels soooooo great going on.  But then it dries.  And it makes your burned skin tight, which hurts even more unless you're reapplying constantly.

More recently, I'm also a lavender girl - like pure lavender oil (no carrier oil needed) on a sunburn is supposed to take the sting out.  And so it does.  A little bit at a time, but it does.

Today, I needed something faster.  Like oh-em-gee-I-gotta-not-hurt!

So, after a little research, here's what I did.

Bragg vinegar.  Get the one "with the mother".  Because that's the good stuff (PS can I just tell you how fired up I am about Apple cider vinegar? I already use it to wash my hair and to help with my bum gallbladder, so finding another use for it was exciting!)

You can usually find it for less than $3 at any grocery store.

Wet down a wash cloth with cool (not cold) water and then splash some vinegar on it (or, if you'd rather, just put some vinegar on a cotton ball with no water.  Same same).

Warning:  It will stink.  Carolyn gagged.

Wipe the sunburned area with it - gently...you know, because it hurts like hell.

Wait for it to dry completely.

At this point, a lot of the sting from the burn should already be gone.

Then, get out your coconut oil.

This is what I use.  PS If you decide to order from Vitacost, let me know.  I have a coupon for $10 off a $30 purchase.

Rub coconut oil all over the burn.

You're gonna want to do this either without clothes on or with clothes on you don't care about - if you get carried away and put too much coconut oil on yourself (this happens to me every, single time I apply coconut oil...because it just smells soooooo good, that if a little is good, a lot is better.  I mean, that's good logic, right?!), it will stain your clothing...and pretty much anything else you touch.

Give it a few minutes (or like 20....if you are a chronic over-applier such as myself) to soak into your skin.

And now, the heat should be slowly leeching itself out of your burn as well.

And, TA-DA! 


It took maybe 20 minutes after I was done to feel completely fine again.

Here I am 5 hours later, and all I have is a little skin tenderness - no stinging, no burning, no heat.

This is the real deal, man.

Oh, keep applying the coconut oil every day to keep your skin hydrated.  Supposedly, it's should also keep your skin from blistering or peeling at all.  We'll see if that's the truth or not in the coming days.

*The morning after...the sting was back, so I reapplied both vinegar and coconut oil (mixed in five drops of lavender because it was sitting right there). Right as rain again. Like I said, it's a pretty bad burn. I'm so lame.