I was talking with one of our patients the other day who said that her friend's son had found love on the Internet. She said, "Both my friend's son and the girl he met were nearing thirty and hadn't found anyone....I'm not saying they're ugly, but well, they're not attractive either..."
The Doctor to The Receptionist this morning, "Well, I think that this girl I want to hire will be able to get along with Erin. That's really hard to find."
The nurse to a patient yesterday, "Well, all of your in-house lab is back, but your outhouse stuff isn't back yet."
Me to a patient, "Yes, sir, I'm sure you've had a colonoscopy this year. The report is right here. You don't remember it? That's where you have to drink that nasty stuff and then they stick a camera up your bum. You still don't remember? Well, you've had one..."
A patient to me after asking what he grows on his farm, "No, no, it's just a hay farm. I don't have any animals. When you get animals you have to work."