He's Good For Something...

1. Last night The Instructor was going to let us go early but instead of just letting him leave, I asked if, since he had to stay there anyway, he would mind giving me a massage. Two hours later after a fabulous deep tissue massage, I went home. Turns out The Instructor is good for something.

2. And speaking of The Instructor, he gave us several "muscle diagrams" last night that we are to study for our next test. He said that we had to be able to name every muscle on the diagram. He didn't understand when I started to complain - the "diagrams" look like someone spilled an ink bottle on the page. You can't even tell it's a person, let alone that it's a person with muscles.

3. The Receptionist was explaining to her eight-year-old niece the other day that even though she is sick, she is unable to take medicine because whatever she takes, the baby also takes. Later on, when The Receptionist sniffed in to clear her nose, her niece said, "Ewww! You're feeding the baby your snot!"

4. The Doctor continues to interview today. He just picked up the phone and said, "Erin, is the system we use for appointments called MediSoft?" Ummm....not so much, Doctor. You see, the way we do appointments is that we have this appointment book circa 1975 that the receptionist writes names in. You know, that book that you write lab orders in everyday? Yeah. That's our "appointment system".

5. The Doctor told me yesterday that he might be interested in joining Facebook. This is the same man who doesn't know how to check his own email.

6. We had to call someone this morning to come and fix the computer. The man showed up in his Mr. T starter kit jewlery wearing so much cologne that I could smell him clear across the room. I thought I had him well-pegged as obviously gay. However, he mentioned his wife so it appears my gay-dar is not as finely tuned as I think it is. Just in case you're wondering, he is now gone but his cologne has permeated my chair and is currently so strong I'm about to pass out.

7. This morning Husband and I were discussing my body type, which he claims is "curvaceous". We then started discussing the fact that I have a Frank Franzetta body (and the only reason I knew the artist's name was because a friend of mine had it on her blog the other day. Incidentally, I also lifted the link from there). Husband said, "See! Your body is artistic!" Bless his heart. He always knows just what to say.

8. Everybody's favorite patient came in this past week after a long hiatus. She wanted to make sure that the entire office staff had seen her new karaoke video she'd posted claiming that she wanted us to "share it with all our friends." She also wanted to make sure that we knew she'd received several complimentary comments about how professional sounding her videos are and that someone commented that she should try out for American Idol. She ended with, "I mean, I'm not saying that what they're saying is true, but well, it is. I'm pretty good."

9. It's been almost an entire week since I planted flowers in our nasty, clay-like flower bed and they aren't dead yet! I'm hoping this is a good sign and that the flowers aren't going to suddenly drop dead tomorrow.

10. This morning, The Doctor was trying to schedule a 90-year-old patient for a pap smear and a mammogram. She declined by saying, "Doctor, I'm 90-years-old. Ain't no way in hell anyone gonna look at my down there or squeeze my those with a machine. I'm not having no damn tests."