Deep Depression

I've been in a deep depression since returning to Texas last Saturday.

Here's why:

1.  Carolyn, who generally has always been a pretty agreeable kid, has been more than horrible all week long.  I figure it's because she's back to being confined inside and without lots of kids to follow around.  I can't even count the number of fits she's had.  Yesterday she even sat down right in the middle of a very busy parking lot and just screamed.  My hands were full, so hefting her 35 pounds of love off the ground was quite the sight.  It took everything I had to not walk away and leave her there.  She also continues to wake up earlier than normal and take shorter naps which just adds to her crankiness. 

2.  I feel like my life is stagnating. 

3.  I'm still in the middle of this crappy hormone therapy without knowing if it will ever pay off.

4.  Carolyn pooped on the floor. 

5.  When I went back to the gym on Monday, it felt like I was starting over.

The good news is that college football started last night.

And also, I've had the following conversation with Carolyn repeatedly over the past 24 hours:

C:  Mommy, be brave!
Me:  I'm going to try.  Are you going to be brave, too?
C:  No, I'm ok.