Thursday, January 08, 2009

Instructor Know-It-All

One of the very best (and by that I mean crappy, could not be more annoying) things about my massage class is the fact that you never really know when or how many new people will be making appearances in class on a nightly basis. We began with four and since that time, the class has ballooned to anywhere between six and nine. The extras include Creepy Chris, Off-the-Shoulder-Shirt Girl, Phone-Sex-Voice Girl, and Chinese Girl.

So, it was no surprise when last night, Early-90's-Dresser showed up. Come to find out she is someone who is trying to get her massage instructor's license and has to observe classes for 30 hours.

Shortly after introducing herself, we found that not only is she a know-it-all (which is fine because apparently I am, too), but she is also a one-upper with a big mouth, as very nearly all one-uppers are.

I might have at least tried to take her seriously but she literally had a better example for every situation the other instructor brought up during the unit on first aid from her own life AND she was wearing a GIANT SILVER BUTTERFLY as a belt buckle. It was made even more entertaining by the fact that she is right in between real human size and troll size - the giant butterfly covered almost her entire body.

By the end of the night, after four-and-half hours of her forcing her complete life history on us followed by being shocked that we aren't farther along in our learning, we all wanted to poke her eyes out with the end of a blunt object.

The only nice thing I have to say is, four hours down, only 26 more to go.

1 comment:

Porter Family said...

She's lucky I wasn't the instructor. I would have gone off. Nicely, of course.