Friday, November 30, 2007
BARF
I work with a lot of Mormons. There are many good things about this, but there is one REALLY BAD thing about it. The receptionist brought Christmas CDs to work today. One of them just happens to be by Janice Kapp Perry (for you who are not familiar, I suggest that you DO NOT become familiar). It's playing right now. It's so annoyingly sugar-coated that I think I'm going to barf. Right here. On my desk. Barf. Or maybe I'll just gouge my eyes out with a fingernail file that I just found. Even Michael McLean is better than this. And that means it's REALLY BAD.
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I whole-heartedly endorse every single part of this entry. And, as I'm sure you can sympathize, Erin, if I ever hear "I'll Find You, My Friend" ever again, in any language, I will most likely fly into a blind, homicidal rage, destroying anyone or anything that crosses my path. I have still not recovered from being forced to sing it/hear it approximately 800,000 times while I was in Hokkaido.
The last time I sang that song, I cried my whole way through it. Seriously. I did. It might have been because I'd just had my first baptism in nine months, or it might have been an allergic reaction. No one can tell at this point. But, I did think about it the other day when I was looking for my Japanese hymn book. Sigh...such good memories of such bad experiences (i.e. that bloody song).
Would you rather listen to 'N Sync or Michael Bolton sing "Silent Night" Or, would you like me to send you a copy of "She see's a diamond"? Our answer? We'd rather smoke cigarettes.
Ummm...yeah, am I would rather lick the ash tray that you used to extinguish your cigarettes.
But just as a side note here, I believe that I was the inspiration for the diamond song. Except that I'm a girl. Let me just remind you of some of the lyrics: SHE SEES A DIAMOND WHERE ALL OF THE OTHERS SAW COAL...
Now if that's not inspirational, I don't know what is.
PS If making fun of Janice Kapp Perry is going to move me a little closer to going to hell, I want to repent right now. But actually, on a scale of 1-10, I'm only sorry at a 1.3.
Erin, you should repent for expressing any desire to repent for your feelings of hostility to music that you truly, in your heart of hearts, know is a plague upon humanity.
Well, I'm not necessarily repenting for making fun of the music - because NO ONE should ever have to do that. I was attempting to repent for making fun of Ms. Perry. I mean, it's not her fault that Mormons all over the world love her music (present company and Elder Mildenstein's pre-mission bishop exculed, of course). Then again, it is her fault for contining to write such rubbish.
I guess the real question is, who is the idiot at her recording company that says, every time she comes in with a new song, "Oh, this is fabulous and no, it doesn't sound at all like every other song you have ever written!"
I think I'll more than likely push some buttons out there but I agree, Mormon Pop music isn't the best out there.
It's cheesy at best, melodramatic, and melancholy.
At least you can say you had good memories (even if the songs WERE that bad).
Don't worry on your birthday, I'll send you a CD for Mormon Pops Greatist Hits Music.
Isn't that what life is all about? Pushing other people's buttons?
Yup. It sure is. My new roommate likes to rile things up and shake people off their comfort zone. I think we'll get along pretty well.
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