LEAVE ME ALONE!

I'm sick to my stomach pretty much all the time. I have been ever since I moved to Texas. It makes me not want to cook (but you probably can't tell that by my expanding waistline).

However, two nights ago, in an attempt to redeem myself in Husband's eyes, I found a recipe that I thought would be nice and even stopped at a convenience store on the way home to pick up the can of beer required by the recipe (which is a story in and of itself because I stood in front of the beer case for twenty minutes trying to decide which one was the best one. I was embarrassed for some reason, and even more embarrassed when they DIDN'T card me and even MORE embarrassed when they didn't even give me a bag to cover up my 24 ounce non-Mormon-esque buying spree).

Anyway, I made the recipe and when I put the half cup of beer in to simmer, I nearly choked. The smell was so strong and so overwhelming that I almost threw up in the pot. By the end of the experience, my entire house smelled like a brewery and I was so sick to my stomach that I had to lay down.

I got to work yesterday morning, still feeling queasy. And what did the doctor say? Naturally, he wanted to draw blood and do nine-hundred-forty-three tests, the most important of which was a pregnancy test (he's been after me for a while to do one because I get sick every morning when the receptionist pops the doctor's daily bag of popcorn...I'm sorry, but 9am is TOO EARLY for popcorn).

By lunch time, I was feeling better AND was sure, due to a negative result on the pregnancy test, that I AM NOT PREGNANT.

At the end of the day, the doctor called me into his office to let me know that we were going to repeat the pregnancy test in a week because they can show false negative for up to 10 days. YES! I KNOW! YOU TOLD ME THAT LAST TIME YOU MADE ME TAKE A PREGNANCY TEST THAT WAS ALSO NEGATIVE.

When is he going to learn to LEAVE ME ALONE?