After watching all of these reports on CNN about people being discriminated against, I've decided that I'm going to make my living filing discrimination suits.
And, I can do that because I was recently discriminated against at the grocery store.
I was standing in line, all of my stuff already off-loaded from my cart when the cashier turned off her lane light and said that she wasn't going to check anyone else out in her line. That was fine by me, as I re-loaded my stuff and made to get in another line.
But it was obviously NOT fine with LaShunda, the lady standing behind me (and I know that her name was LaShunda, because she had conveniently tattooed it right across her bulging cleavage). In fact, LaShunda, who looked like the lady in "Norbit", was downright angry. She started with, "Oh, I know you goin' ta check the rest of us out. I know you is."
When the clerk responded that she wasn't going to check anyone else out, LaShunda started yelling something about talking to the manager and getting the lady fired, while also slamming into me with her extra large bosoms. The only thing I could think was, "I have to get out of here! Please just let me get by! I'm going to be crushed!"
After about five minutes, the manager came out and settled everyone down. THEN, he said that he would check LaShunda AND the lady behind her out, but NOT me, even though I was first in line. By that time, it didn't really dawn on me that his decision was totally unfair because my only concern was getting out of LaShunda's way.
The way I figure it, I'm entitled to at least $1 million for pain and suffering from the store and an extra $500,000 from LaShunda due to extensive injuries sustained at the hands of her ginormous, manhandling breasts.
3 comments:
The moral of the story is: Don't mess with people who have "La" at the beginning of their names. Or, perhaps the moral is that you should add "La" to the beginning of yours.
Yes, LaErin certainly has a ring to it. LaErin - it's Spanish for "the Erin". Or Southern for "mean with big breasts". Of course, that could be my Indian name.
I found your story quite hilarious! As my name is Lashunda and I don't have a supersized attitude or breasts. It's too bad that a name that starts with La has a negative connotation associated with it. After all, I didn't name myself. I have thought about changing it because it prevents people from getting to know the real me. I am a college educated professional with a sense of humor. I wonder if I should change my name. What do you think, seriously?
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