Hello, New Best Friend

1.  There's a man who lives on the corner just down from the church.  I want to be his best friend.  Because every Sunday on the way home from church, he's sitting out in his lawn chair, next to his smoker, which is always belching out the most delicious smelling smoke EVER.  I have no idea what's in there, but I want some.

2.  And speaking of smoke, we live right in between two cigarette smokers.  Neither one of them smokes in their house.  Instead, they go out on their patios.  Then their cigarette smoke seeps into our house.  Guh.  It's so gross.

3.  I love the Superman movies.  However, who on earth was in charge of casting Lois Lane?  I'm sorry, but she's just not attractive.  Oh, and she smokes, too.

4.  I gave my first pregnancy massage yesterday.  This despite the fact that I have never been trained in pregnancy massage, nor did I have any idea what I was doing.  I did the very best I could.  I had an epiphany the other day that pregnancy massage is where the money's at.  I mean, I would have paid anything to feel better when I was pregnant.  Then, I went on the Internet to buy the specialized pregnancy massage pillows only to find that they cost $350.  Oh, and I'd also have to find a continuing education class so I'd do it right.  Maybe in a couple of months.

5.  Carolyn has this new thing - with my underwear.  If I leave out the laundry basket (and let's face it, it's always out because of my great aversion to folding laundry and putting it away), she pulls up on it, yanks a pair of my panties out, and presses them against her eyes.  Then, she slobbers all over them, sometimes spits up on them, and then puts them back.  She never does this with Husband's underwear, just mine.

6.  Is there any reason why clothing companies make baby clothes out of material that must be ironed?  All of Carolyn's Sunday dresses are made out of the same dumb stuff.  I mean, really, who on earth is going to iron them?  I can barely get the two of us ready for church on Sunday without ironed clothes, I have no idea what time we'd get there if I had to iron, too.

7.  One of Husband's Facebook friends posted last night that she had to go to sleep early so she could get up this morning to "get her worship on".  I think I'm going to start saying that instead of "go to church".

8.  Despite the fact that they've been running the same Cadbury commercial for at least 20 years, I still get a kick out of the lion pretending to be a chicken...or is it a rabbit?  A clucking rabbit.

9.  I so want to go on a trip.  To like Washington DC or New York.  Or Ireland.  Or Bora Bora.  Except I really am not ready to put on a bathing suit.

10.  Today is my sister's 37th birthday.  Happy Birthday, Nancy!