What I Need

1.  While on a walk today with Carolyn, we were stopped by several old people standing out in their driveways.  They commented on how pretty Carolyn is - I mean, what are they going to say, that she's an ugly baby?  It made me decide that I need more old people in my life.  I just love, love, love them.  I wonder how you sign up to deliver Meals on Wheels.  And I wonder if you can take your babies with you to do it.

2.  And, while watching a movie this evening, I decided I need my very own gospel choir.  Like the ones in the black churches.  They can follow me around, singing when I need strength.  And I can yell, "Thank you, Jesus!" whenever I feel is necessary.

3.  Today was a busy one at work.  I had three deep tissue massages in a row - two hours and one hour and a half.  Exhausted doesn't even begin to describe how I feel right now.

4.  Again, why do people think they need to share everything with me?  I had a first time client today that told me about her husband's sexual tendencies.  She's 55.  He's 66.  One of his tendencies may or may not be to bite her rear end.  As evidenced by a perfect bite mark bruise on one of her cheeks.  I could have gone an entire life time without knowing that.

5. I'm thinking about putting Carolyn on a mauve food only diet.  That would include apples, pears, bananas, and oatmeal.  Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that we have yet to find a food she doesn't like, but all of her clothes and burp rags are now stained some variety of the color yellow.  This would also mean that we wouldn't have to change her crib sheet every other day (and really, with the damage she does, we should change it daily, but I don't do the laundry often enough for that). 

6.  Guess what DVD I found int he $5 bin?!  Legally Blond.  I love Legally Blond almost as much as I love Titanic.

7. The Judy has been partying it up in southern Nevada with her sister, Nancy, for the past 6 weeks or so.  She goes to the Senior Citizen Center for lunch sometimes.  There's a man there, Willis, who digs The Judy.  The Judy, however, doesn't return the sentiment.  She said, "Oh, hey, Erin, I'll tell ya, I either have to get there really early or really late so Willis won't sit by me.  What if he touches me?"

8.  I ordered business cards.  As in I now have something with my name on it.  Like a real, honest-to-goodness adult.

9.  Carolyn is sick.  Will there ever be a time where I can go more than two weeks without saying that?

10.  I spend a lot of time wishing I could wear red lipstick. The kind that doesn't rub off.  And then I want to wear high heels and walk around provocatively chewing on the end of a pencil.  Kind of like Beyonce.  But with less in the rear department.