Friday, August 27, 2010

TV: My New Best Friend

1.  I watch a lot of TV now - I pretend that the people on the screen are my friends and they're talking to me.  It makes me less lonely.  Of course, I don't pretend that all of them are my friends, because have you seen how many fruit cakes are on TV?  I swear.  I have to avoid Maury and Judge Shondrella because all they talk about is paternity tests.  Then the man and the woman involved yell at each other and call each other mean names.  And all I can think is, "Please tell me someone else is raising that baby!"

2.  I watch Ellen every day.  That lady is hysterical.  She makes fun of lesbians and that's just as funny as black people making fun of themselves.  I now have a new dream job - to work on her show.  I think it would be a kick in the pants.  I wonder if she's that funny all the time.

3.  Josh Turner was a co-host on the Today show today.  I just love him.  I think he should be on there all the time.  Mostly because then Kathie Lee Gifford wouldn't be.  Seriously, how on earth has Kathie Lee stayed around this long?  She's almost as bad as Joy Behar.

4.  The Alabama football team has a special show on ESPN.  I don't really know what it's called.  But, I watch it and think, "The one and only reason I can't play football is because I couldn't handle all the yelling."  Really.  Practice is nothing but grown men yelling at other grown men about how they "just don't get it" and to "get back on the ball".  Also, Nick Saban kind of looks like a weasel.

5.  The Food Network has a show called Secrets of a Restaurant Chef.  The lady makes the best looking food I've ever seen.  I want to make it, too, except then I would have to buy like seventeen things for one recipe that I would never use again.  And it would take hours to make one meal.  This is why I'll never be a chef.  But look at this recipe - I'm salivating over it.

6.  TLC runs marathons of A Baby Story all day every day.  I tried to watch it once out of sheer boredom, but I couldn't stomach it.  I thought that since I've now had a child, it wouldn't gross me out.  Wrong.  Child birth is grody.  Plus, I can't imagine letting a camera crew follow me around before and after my baby was born.  It wouldn't have made very good TV. 

7.  The Texas State Department of Health is sponsoring an "Every Ounce Counts" breastfeeding campaign.  The commercials run on TV about once every 15 minutes.  I have to change the channel because they make me feel really guilty.

8.  The local news has a segment called Facebook Friday where they ask a question and then read all the Facebook answer posts.  The guy who does it has to be the worst reporter I've ever seen.  It's worth watching because it's such a train wreck.

9.  I can't watch CBS Evening News.  I think it's because of Katie Couric's eyeliner.

4 comments:

Kari McCallon said...

Sorry Erin, but I'm going to work for Ellen. I used to watch her everyday until my schedule changed and so did her show time. Love it!

T. Edlin said...

I've been following your blog for a couple of months now, and you make me smile. Repeatedly. However, with your comment about Nick Saban, you've taken me to a whole new level. I laughed out loud! It's probably illegal to get this much enjoyment out of a blog. We could SO be friends. Thanks for your honesty and humor. And your little one is precious, btw.

Tena

T. Edlin said...

P.S. I don't know what Judge Shondrella is, but I'm staying far away from that one.

Peakview said...

I came across your blog shortly before Carolyn was born and enjoyed it because you write beautifully and are brutally honest. I have 3 grown daughters whom I breastfed (when hardly anyone breastfed), so of course I am pro-breastfeeding. I have a daughter who succesfully has breastfed 5 children(another one on the way) but my middle daughter tried with each of her 2 children and couldn't get past the cracked nipples & pain, etc. She diligently pumped for 6 weeks, but never had enough milk. Each time she quit breastfeeding and used formula - her chldren are now 13 months and 3 years and are healthy and beautiful children. She could finally enjoy motherhood after she gave up the notion that breastfeeding is always the best. And of course, she has friends who unintentionally try to make her feel bad by implying how wonderful they are because the have so much milk, etc. But the bottom line is that each of us has to do what is best for ourselves and our babies and if that means foregoing breastfeeding, I think that is fine. The most important thing is to be there for your child and when you are there for your child - be there 100 percent (and by that I mean it is fine to work outside the home as long as the time you spend with your child is quality time). Sorry this is so long...hugs to you, Erin, you are a wonderful mom - you just need to enjoy being a mom. It is wonderful!!!