Unused Pillow Honing Device

We, at the Peters' household love our pillows.

We have pillows all over the place - five on the couch (not including the four decorative ones), five in the spare room, three on our floor, and six on our bed. 

Out of all of these pillows, I have two that are specifically mine. 

This is because Husband likes to ball up pillows and stick them under every crevice of his body.  It makes the pillow stuffing break up and that equals a lumpy pillow.  I hate lumpy pillows. 

I've been faithfully guarding my pillows for over two years.  If Husband lays a hand on them, I throw a fit and, unless I'm extra-super quick, a tug-of-war ensues.  Then he makes some comment about how it was on his side of the bed or how I'm always so mean to him.  This happens at least twice a week.

Husband also has this sense.  It's like a honing device for unused pillows. 

When I get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night (which, for the record, now happens at least 43 times), I have to make sure my special pillows are out of arm's reach for Husband.

Because if they're not, by the time I come back, he's unconsciously commandeered them and stuffed them completely under his sleeping-wouldn't-wake-up-if-a-Mac-truck-slammed-through-the-wall-body.

Last night, I was careless. 

I blame it on Benedryl. 

I came back from the bathroom to find literally no pillows available for my use. 

Twice.

After much rocking, pulling, jostling, and poking, Husband finally gave them up, only to make a grab for them later on.

Husband sees no problem with his pillow stealing tendencies.  Because he says he's not stealing.  He says he can't steal something when it's already his.

Plus, it's hard to put together a good case because in the morning, according to him, he never remembers what he's done.