The Human Scale

1.  We were at the grocery store on Saturday where Husband was trying to buy one pound of tomatillos.  Maybe you've gotta know Husband to think it's funny, but he was dead set on getting just ONE POUND and not an ounce more.  So much so that he wandered all over the produce section trying to find a working scale.  When he came back without having found one, I told him to give me the bag, which I weighed in my carefully practiced hand (read: just trying to get out of the produce section), and said, "That's about right.  Get two more tomatillos and I think that should be good."  Husband looked dubious.  He kept telling me how much trouble I'd be in if we got home without an entire pound of tomatillos.  At the check out counter, the highly annoyed check out clerk weighed them for us.  Guess what the weight was.  Just guess.  1.01 pounds.  BOO-YA.  I am the Human Scale.

2.  I haven't thrown up in four whole days.  I've been nauseated, but have been able to control it.  Ahhhhh....it's like being a new woman.  I don't want to get all optimistic, thinking that the morning sickness is over all together, but I'm feeling pretty fired up about it.

3.  You can remove one girl from The-Friends-of-Erin-Pregnancy-Pact.  My friend, Clarissa, had her "little" baby on Friday - an over-9-pound baby boy.

4.  I'm still really missing my old class at church.  Mostly because the new kids just aren't that funny.  Although, one of the girls, when talking about how Heavenly Father loves us so he sent Jesus Christ, stated, "Yeah, and Jesus made my happy place."

5.  I just found out what the very worst thing about pregnancy is.  No, it's not the sick, the tired, or the feelings of inadequacy.  It's when women you don't even know feel the need to share their very worst birthing story with you out of the blue.  Ummm...lady, can't you see I'm already semi-hysterical?  I don't need to hear about how they had to push your baby back into your uterus so they could perform a C-section.  And also, please never talk about ripping flesh again.

6.  This weekend we made shredded pork.  Twice.  Mostly because I'm currently having an aversion to beef.  The only problem now is that I think my clothes smell like it.  I've been sitting at my desk smelling myself for the last 30 minutes trying to determine the source.

7.  There was a Super Mario party at Marshall and Shannon's this weekend.  I went just for the company.  This is because I can't play Super Mario Brothers.  In fact, I can't play any video games.  I end up just running around in circles and half the time I forget who my character is to begin with.  My question is, when is the Wii karaoke contest?  Because let's face it, I'm pretty much the Karaoke Queen of the Entire World.

8.  Husband now has blackmail material on me.  I mean, like REAL blackmail material.  When I get ready in the morning, I like to turn on my iPod and sing and dance.  Sunday morning, unbeknownst to me, he stood behind me for at least five minutes taping my performance, which he has threatened to put on Facebook.  I don't get embarrassed easily, but if that showed up somewhere, I would die.  I have yet to receive Husband's ransom request for it.

9.  The things that people get riled up about baffle me.  I almost got my eyes scratched out this weekend for laughing at something someone else didn't think was funny.  This happens to me a lot.  I guess I should stop making fun of people. 

10.  I can't wait until Valentine's Day is over.  Because then we move on to the best candy of all time:  Cadbury Mini-Eggs.  It's like a holiday in and of itself.