Christmas in The Ruby Valley

After a week-long trip to Ruby Valley, I came back to Texas late last night just in time to hop in the bed where I might have wished Husband Happy New Year before he started snoring.

The trip to The Ruby was fabulous.  Mostly because it was snowy and cold (10-20 degrees...except for the last day where it was 30 with six inches of brand new snow).  And that makes sense in my head.  I understand cold.  I understand how to dress for it and how to un-thaw my nose hairs.  I also enjoy spending time by the fire, which really was my secret to success.

What I don't understand is Texas hot.  I mean, how many clothes can I honestly take off before people start throwing up at my over-abundance of showy-snowy-white-flesh?  If anyone has the answer to that, please let me know.

Anyway, here are the highlights (lowlights) of the trip:

1.  I was stopped for the random pat-down at BOTH airports.  Apparently I am very suspicious. In Houston the woman kept going over and over my stomach and finally told me she was going to have to have me show her my tummy.  I mean, I always have had abs of steel but I didn't think they felt like a weapon.  I pulled up my shirt, revealing the top of my over-sized-extremely-unattractive pregnancy pants and she started laughing.  She said, "GIRL!  Whatchu wearin' those funny pants for?"

2.  When I got home, I pulled all of my pills out of my bag and set them by the sink so I wouldn't forget to take them.  The Judy, thinking I'd thoughtfully placed a delicious peanut treat for her right by the sink, chewed up a handful of my prenatal vitamins. 

3.  After asking for some gel for my hair, The Judy produced a silver vat of stuff that looked like purple Elmer's glue.  I put it in my hair anyway.  Let me tell you, Johnny Depp in all his greasiness had nothing on me.

4.  My nephews are hilarious.  Four-year-old Ian, who got his thumb stuck in the treadmill last month (with a consequent visit to the ER) wanted to relate the story to me.  He said, "Well, Ewin, I was exercising on the treadmill (translation: he was hanging off the side like a monkey) and then I decided I needed to get down in there and have a closer look."

5.  I was lucky enough to catch a 24-hour stomach virus on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.  I literally couldn't keep anything down for more than 20 minutes.  24-hour stomach virus + morning sickness = ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!

6.  Christmas morning was fantastic.  It was mostly all the adults watching my nephew, Britian, open his Christmas presents.  My mother gifted me several sets of baby clothes (and let me say this, if this baby isn't a little girl, it might not have a single scrap of clothing).  I just sat there watching all the commotion around me and felt more content than I've felt in a long time.  I was missing Husband but couldn't help but think that it was one of the greatest times of my life.

7.  The Judy and I stayed at the sweet hotel Ramada the night before last.  We grabbed our luggage and opened the room only to find that we apparently weren't the only ones staying in the room.  When I went back to the counter the lady assured me we were the only registered guests in room 110.  Umm....then why is there a man I don't know in there?  We were immediately upgraded to a two bedroom, two bathroom suite and given free breakfast and dinner.  Not bad for $50.

8.  The Judy decided to take advantage of the giant jet tub in the suite bathroom.  About ten minutes after she jumped in she turned on the jets and started to scream.  I ran in there to find that she hadn't covered all the jets completely with water and when she started the jets, the water sprayed her in the face and consequently, all over the bathroom.

9.  On the flight from Salt Lake back to Denver, I was upgraded to first-class.  I think it was purely for being awesome.  I was feeling pretty high on the hog until I met my seat mates.  They were a they-found-one-another-newlywed couple, she, The Great Swine Flu Incubator, and he, The Weed Smoking Drunk.  I was disgusted with all the coughing and sniffling, thinking, "Oh, good grief, I'm pregnant.  I'm going to catch whatever she has.  I catch EVERYTHING now."   I guess the good news is that they spent a majority of the flight with their tongues down one another's throats (and his hand up her shirt) so there were probably very few germs actually escaping.

Happy New Year, everyone!