A Plethora of Offenses

I know I've mentioned before (700 bizillion times) that Husband is a weird sleeper. When I say weird, I mean that he and I have full conversations that he never remembers in the morning. We also have middle-of-the-night "fights" - these include fighting for pillows (There are five pillows on the bed. I only require one. Apparently Husband requires EVERY PILLOW ON THE BED no matter how many there are), blankets, bed space, and me kicking him repeatedly to get him to stop snoring.

The other night he fell asleep on the couch and every time I suggested he go to bed, he very rudely replied, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Then, thirty minutes later, he sat straight up, kissed me on the cheek, and sweetly said, "Baby, I'm going to make all your dreams come true by going to bed."

At 3am I realized he was wrapped up in the bedspread like a burrito. I told him that I needed some covers because I was cold. He looked at me and said, "No, you're not."

Not long after that, he stole my only pillow and when I asked for it back, he yelled, "I DID! I DID!"

Out of pure exhaustion, I finally conceded the fight and had to sleep in the other room (thank heaven we have one) where I have cleverly stashed a good extra pillow.

Naturally, the next morning, he remembered none of the previous night. He never remembers. And he accuses me of making things up.

My question is, WHY WOULD I MAKE IT UP? One of my biggest pet peeves is being woken up when I'm not ready to be awake. Why on earth would I prolong my sleeplessness by staying up to make up stories?