Saturday, April 19, 2008

Uno Mas Cerveza, Por Favor, Senorita

I bought beer yesterday. It was the second time in eight months that I found a recipe that called for it. Despite the fact that I had a VERY bad experience with the beer cooking last time (the smell made me sick for days and induced the consequent destroying of the recipe), I forged ahead once again.

I went down to the HEB so I could find "one bottle of Mexican beer". Thanks to Thanet, I totally know that Corona is Mexican. Naturally, when I got to the beer aisle, I found that beer at the supermarket can only be bought in six packs. Never one to be deterred or bullied into buying something that I don't need, I slipped one bottle out of the pack and put it in my cart thinking that if they could sell me six, they more than certainly could sell me just one.

The seventeen-year-old-dyed-blonde-who-is-not-old-enough-to-buy-beer-and-too-cheeky-not-to-card-me at the check-out counter thought differently. She pulled the beer off the conveyor belt and looked at me disapprovingly. She wanted to know where the rest of the six-pack was. Naturally, stupid girl, I left it on the shelf.

She just kept repeating over and over that it was only sold in six-packs, to which I replied that I only needed that one. After several re-runs, I asked if she couldn't just get in her little computer and sell it to me for $1.50 for the bottle.

The bagger-boy, who was obviously enthralled by our exchange nodded his head vigorously and I was immediately checked-out. When the beer came rolling toward him, the bagger-boy winked at me, nodded in a knowing way, and placed the beer in the drink holder on my cart - just like a Coke or a Dr. Pepper.

Apparently he thought the reason I was fighting so hard for the one bottle of beer was because I was willing to break the open-container law in order to get my fix of Corona on the way home. Perhaps that's why the scriptures counsel to avoid the very appearance of evil. I have been branded as an uncontrollable alcoholic.

4 comments:

Porter Family said...

Quit using recipes that call for beer. Use wine instead. At least that way you know you only need one bottle.

The Pittmeister said...

You bought Corona? Corona is the bottom of the barrel when it comes to Mexican beer. Take it from a native Arizonan. The next time you need one bottle of mexican beer, use Pacifico, Tecate, or Carta Blanca. Those are the best Mexican beers.

Holli said...

I love this entry - so funny! I once bought wine at HEB for a recipe and I drove home crying because the lady DID NOT card me. This was especially sucky because of the sign at her register that said we card 45 and under. I was lately told, too, that I look thirty. So, go figure... Just be glad you were carded.

Erin said...

I wasn't carded. That was part of the problem. Apparently I am getting old. Of course, the girl I work with was very surprised to learn that I am almost 30...she thought I was 23 or 24.

And Pittmeister - looks like I will have to be consulting you next time I go shopping. I have no idea which beers are good and which ones are not!! BTW - how's the visa for your wife coming?? Sounds like a royal pain.